How important is Communication in a relationship? | By Raeveen Pasupathy
Communication has been one of the most important factor in any relationships. Communicating actively allows you to effectively share…
How important is Communication in a relationship?
Communication has been one of the most important factor in any relationships. Communicating actively allows you to effectively share feelings, opinions, and expectations. However, many people fail to communicate due to the fear of rejection or the fear that they’ll end up upsetting or even losing their partner, family or friends. Communication is not only the paramount of growth, but it is also essential for building a long-lasting and fulfilling relationships.
Have you asked yourself what could be the biggest problem in any of your relationships, whether at home, work, partner or with your closest friends? It could be that your communication is unhealthy.
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Identifying different kinds of speech
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There are two kinds of speech; Nourishing & Toxic.
Let’s put it this way; From personal relationships to multi-billion dollar business deals, healthy communication is vital. So, what exactly does the word “healthy communication” mean? Before we dive in, I think it’s best to think of communication like food. Some of it is nourishing, and some is toxic and poisonous.
Nourishing speech is understanding and being positive, while toxic speech fills people with negative emotions like anger and frustration.
Let’s imagine you’re for feedback on a project, when your boss comes in and says, “This is absolutely terrible. You’re a useless waste of space”. That would certainly be toxic speech.
But, on the other hand, if she said, “I think there are some things we could improve here”, that would be nourishing speech. You could use it constructively.
So, how can you work on improvising your nourishing speech?
The first step is to understand your way of communication. This is where “mindfulness” comes into play. Practice mindfulness.
Why mindfulness?
When you’re in a mindful state, you’ll feel detached, which allows you to examine your communication objectively. You’ll realize some things you might want to say are toxic, so you’ll be able to stop yourself before you say them.
Quote:
“With mindfulness we can produce thoughts, speech, and actions that will feed our relationships and help them grow and thrive.”
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Communicate with yourself first
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You probably spend a good portion of your day communication with others, whether it’s in person or online. But how much time do you spend communicating with yourself? Probably very little.
Communicating with yourself is essential for mindfulness, which means it’s also essential for healthy communication. You communicate with yourself when you listen to your own mind and body. It can be as simple as sitting down and concentrating on your breathing.
When you do this, you’ll be able to focus completely on the moment, not the past or the future. Just you, your health and your emotional state at the time.
Quote:
“If you can’t accept yourself. How can you love another person and communicate love to him or her?”
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Listen to the suffering of others
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Have you ever discovered something completely new about a long-term partner? Something you can’t believe you missed?
Well, we don’t always fully understand people we’re close to. This is often because we don’t listen to each other. Sometimes our minds are just somewhere else when our partner is talking. Your spouse might be describing a serious problem in your marriage, but you’re thinking about cleaning the pool or paying the electricity bill.
However, even when we do listen to our partner, sometimes we interrupt them to say “why we think they’re wrong”.
✅ : The good news is there’s a way to solve this, “mindful listening”. Mindful listening means carefully taking in what others say without judging them.
When someone’s telling you about their suffering, you might be tempted to interrupt them, especially if you want to correct their perceptions. However, this might lead to a discussion where you aren’t truly focusing on their feelings, which is “what you should be doing”.
Also, mindful listening also means not blaming the person for anything. For example, imagine you’re listening to a friend whose girlfriend has just left him. Even if you think if was partly his fault, you have to recognize that this isn’t the time to say that, because it will make him suffer more.
But, have you noticed how powerful a sentence “I am here for you” can be?
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The relationship cure
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Each and every relationship comes with it’s own set of problems. However, at often times, it relates to communication issues.
Why communication is important in any relationship?
Communication gives assurance. Communication does wonders. Look at how much problems evade or disappear when the communication is healthy.
Here are some steps you could use to further enhance or develop your relationship:
- Get to know each other better.
Getting to know each other does not mean by doing a weekend visit at your favorite Coffee Shop or even visiting their Family. However, the key is to determining whether you’re compatible with another person is to communicate with them from the offset. From understanding their likes and dislikes through to gaining an insight into their morals and values, open and frequent communication is essential if you want to really get to know someone and allow them to know the real you. - Avoid misunderstanding
Another reason to communicate effectively is to avoid any misunderstandings, which can lead to a breakdown of communication or the relationship as a whole. - Set clear expectations
We all have different expectations in life. In any relationship, it’s important that these expectations are made clear from the offset, to avoid one party upsetting the other without realizing. Always be open and honest and never be afraid to stand by what you believe in. Once expectations are set, you should be able to enjoy a healthy, positive and satisfying relationship.
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Conclusion
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With all the methods or tips/tricks listed for a healthier relationship with anyone around you.
Never forget that as much as communication is important, comprehension is equally important too. Never trade any of these.
Stay Safe. Stay Healthy. Have a good day ahead.